Every female isn’t a women...

You’re not a woman based on your sex, but you’re a woman based on your mentality. Just like all males aren’t “Men”, it goes for ladies; all females aren’t Women. A “Real woman thinks like a woman, and she knows when to put away her childhood ways, thoughts and actions. A “real woman” understands value. Not just the value of the dollar, not just the value of herself, she knows the value of a “Real Man”. A “Real Woman” knows what respect is. Respect for self, respect for her family and friends, and respect for her mate. A “real woman” doesn’t degrade herself by using the word bitch to describe herself or her homegirls. There are more traits and characteristics of a “Real Woman”, but I will talk about those in the next article. Ladies if you are a real woman this article isn’t going to bother you, just read it and pass it on to your friends, family, co-workers that you know are lost.

A lot of ladies seem to say there are no real men out there. In my walk of life, in my journey I can truly say there are plenty of “Real Men” out there. You just have to know how to spot the “Real Men”. Once you know what a real man is you will know how to stay away from the wannabes, and the outright fakes. Ladies, you already know what a real man is but you overlook him every time, and you seem to go for the glitter and gold.
Every female isn’t a women...
There is nothing wrong with wanting a guy with a nice car, but overlooking the guy that just has the “nice car” and not the rims and the loud speakers is most female’s problem. You want a “Real Man, but you are looking at all the material qualities instead of the “True make of a Man”. Having rims and a shiny car doesn’t make you a man. Females complain all the time that men are materialistic are choose women just based on looks. It’s a problem when a guy choose a women cause she has a big butt or big breast, but it’s suppose to be cool when you choose a guy because of glitter and gold and materialistic items. You want to “Keep it real”, then let’s keep it real.

Ladies if you want a good man a good man will find you. If you want a guy with all the flash and the bling, then get that guy, but don’t get him confused with the definition of a “Real Man”. Yes, he possibly could be a good man, but if all you are going for is what you see on the outside then you are the one that’s lost.

Women complain all the time, that they want a “real man”, but they by past the real man, and choose what you call, “I need someone down; I need me a “Real Nigga” in my life”. You say, you want a real man, but when you speak you say you want a real nigga. When you get the time look up the word Nigger (Nigga), and you real truly see what you are speaking into your life. You are getting exactly what you ask for, so please don’t complain. Many of you out there have heard a female say, I want me a real nigga or they may say, I need a thug in my life, I want me a “rough neck”. “Really, is that what you really want in your life? Did you really just say that?

There are plenty of real men that has the streets savvy (swagg), book smarts and most important the Love of God and the Fear of God. You over look them all the time, because they don’t have all the bling, worldly things, and drama that you are looking for. You see a real man isn’t all the time “running the streets, all the time he isn’t hanging with the boys. Real men don’t have baby mommas or children out there that don’t know that he is dad. I'm not saying a real man doesn’t have kids, he does, but the title would be “Father”, not baby daddy. A real man has respect for women, so he doesn’t say “my baby momma” he calls her by her name, or the “mother of my child/children”. A real man will make spiritual growth a priority in the household. So ladies, let’s keep it real, if you want to keep staying in your rut and keep staying in the same type of relationships, then you please keep choosing the same type of “I need someone down, I need me a “Real Nigga” in my life. Keep on choosing a mate that you classify as someone’s baby daddy. Keep on choosing a mate that has multiple kids that he doesn’t take care of. Just a thought, if he already don’t take care of the kids that he have, why would you expect him to take care of the child that you have with him? If this is what you want, by all means stay where you are; you must be satisfied.

So, if you are with a bum, if you are with a guy that doesn’t have the qualities of a man, then this isn’t for you. Stay with what you got, you must me satisfied. If you are with a dude who you know isn’t a man, or don’t have the values or qualities that you are looking for then this isn’t for you, stay with what you got, you must be satisfied. If you talk about your man, if you degrade him, if you know he isn’t the one for you, but you stay with him no matter what, then this isn’t for you. Stay with what you got, you must be satisfied. If you are always looking up and the same type of guys approach you and that type of guy is the kind you don’t want, then at some point you have to look at yourself. Ladies, look at yourself, face the facts and look at the truth. Why does the same, no good, guys always approach me? Sometimes you have to look at yourself. People are drawn to you based on what’s on the inside of you. The things on the inside of you always seem to show up on the outside. So, ladies let us keep it real, do a reality check, and truly evaluate yourself and figure out, “why am I attracting the same no life type guys.
Is it your attitude?
Is it the words and phrases you speak over your life? Is it the type of clothes you wear? Is it the type of locations you go to? What are you doing to attract mates? Sometimes you have to change yourself along with changing your surroundings. Change the way you speak and think. Speak and think life and hope, do not speak negative things into your life.

For those who have a good man, who have a “real man” then this article isn’t for you.You should be proud to have a good man. Lift your man up, speak life into him. The more you praise your man, the more he will do for you. Stroke his ego, and watch as he strives harder daily to treat you as the queen you are. As you stroke his ego, he will do more and more to receive those praises from you. Remember, a women’s tongue, a women’s attitude has major affects on the relationships she is in.

For those who are looking for a “real man’, a godly man, here goes some traits, qualities, virtues you look should look for. Even if you have a real man, these traits will improve what you already have. Read and grow together in this process. Selflessness
A man that focus his time, attention, energy to God first, then his wife/family. After that everything else will fall into place accordingly i.e., career, family, hobbies, etc. For the most part most men or selfish, and that is a big reason for most relationships/marriages not working. Seek a man that is willing to put his feelings, his pride to the side for the growth, for the better of the relationship/family.
Humility- Yes, you want a man that is prideful, but you do not want that pride his ego being the downfall of the relationship. Yes, men are taught to be strong, powerful, to lean and depend on their might, on their ability, but you want him to have a balance. You want a man that will lean to God for strength. Lean to you, and trust you. You want a man that will put his pride, his ego to the side for God, and in turn he will be more committed to you and the family. Loving- Do not choose a man that loves you because of this or because of that. When those things run out, the love will run out also. In our modern day relationships, we love the way the world wants us to love. We should love like the love that is talked about in Ephesians 5:25, Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. This type of love is spiritual and it is unconditional. This type of Love is only available from God. Kindness- You want a man that isn’t a emotional abuser. Many men will say, I never hit my mate, but words can cause just as much hurt and damage. You want a man that will speak life into you and into the relationship. You want a man that will not verbally harm you, as well as physically harm you. Like Proverbs 18:21 says, the tongue has the power of life and death. You want a man that is sincere to your thoughts, feelings, and emotions. Gentleness- Life struggles may cause a man to be rough, tough, and build up this strong outer layer and loose the natural gentleness that he possess. To be a godly man he must be gentle. When you are praying for your mate, pray that he has gentleness
Honesty- You want to choose a man that you can trust. Being honest goes both ways, strive to not bring the trust issues you have from your previous relationships. You want a man that will always tell the truth, no matter if the truth will hurt you. You would rather everything come out when it happen, so there won’t be a chance for something small to turn big.
Faithfulness- Cheating, Infidelity is on the rise in all relationships and marriages.You want a man that is going to be faithful to you emotionally and physically. You want a man that will make a lifetime bond to give himself to only you physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

So your man should be a leader, a protector, a teacher, a provider, a worship leader, a lover, a disciplinarian, a counselor, an encourager, and should be the priest of their homes. These are the traits and the characteristics you should look for.

I am not bashing women I know many will feel that way. This is more of a plea, a warning, just an article to shed light on the subject. This is a public service announcement, (PSA) to the lost females. Again, this was for the lost females, if you are a “Real Woman this article wasn’t for you. I know many of you will also say, “what about the fellas, they have their issues too”. Right now I'm focusing on one subject matter at a time, but coming soon is the article titled, “So you want to keep it real”, “I want me a real woman” versus “I want me a down ass bitch

Thoughts for the next article.Those of you who use bitch to describe yourself or your homegirls, here goes the definition. Bitch- (1) Word used to describe the act of whining excessively. (2) A modern-day servant; a person who performs tasks for another, usually degrading in status. (3) A female dog. Just a question, for those of you who use this word, is this how you see yourself and your friends? For the men that use this word are these the qualities you really want in a woman. We have to be smart in the words and phrases we speak. Let us strive to do better, Let us strive to live godly, so we will continue to be “Real Men” and “Real Women
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